Opinion #8: Coldplay

by Jennifer Has Opinions

On Friday, I was sick.  Really sick.  Fever, chills, can’t-remember-driving-to-work sick.  So after about an hour at the office, I gathered the strength to walk back down the stairs to go home to my beloved TheraFlu.  I don’t know about y’all, but driving while sick always makes me a little more reflective.  It’s like my brain doesn’t have the energy to focus on the millions of things that are typically on my mind (the Arab Spring, why bad things happen to good people, the possibility of time travel, why more people don’t agree with me that The Snorks was the very best of Saturday morning cartoons, etc) and so it just hones in on all the little things around me.  Like the radio.

I am a lucky girl.  I live about two songs from work, if you’re the type to measure time and distance in such a manner.  Most days, I jump from radio station to radio station (or cd to cd) trying to find the best possible two songs to get me through my drive, eventually just giving in and turning it to NPR for the news.  But on Friday, I was trying to stay really focused on driving, so I just left the radio alone.  The song playing when I started the car was by Coldplay.  Understandable.  As it has been explained to me, people really enjoy Coldplay.  But then something weird happened.  The next song they played was a Coldplay song too.  Right there, in the span of my short drive home, the only two Coldplay songs I knew were played on the radio.  This was very unsettling to my poor, cold-ridden brain.  That’s not how the world works.  Radio stations don’t play back-to-back songs by the same “artist.”  At the time, and I’m playing the sick card here, it felt like something out of The Twilight Zone.

Here’s where it gets really weird: The second Coldplay song ended just as I was pulling up to my house.  The DJ came on the air and talked about the song, and she said that it was by some other band- not Coldplay at all.  Huh?  So once I parked, I googled the only line of lyrics I was able to remember from that first Coldplay song they played, and it turned out that WASN’T BY COLDPLAY EITHER!  I was so confused.  These songs were my only reference point for Coldplay, but they were by other bands that I’d never heard of.  Bands that, apparently like Coldplay, would like to try really hard to be the U2 of their generation.  I sat stunned for a moment like someone who’d had a little piece of her world thrown off its axis.  I decided that my next step should be to google Coldplay so that I could figure out what they really sound like.  But then…

It occurred to me that I had, in the midst of my sickness, been given a gift.  I am person who lives in the first world who has somehow managed to not know a real Coldplay song.  I have the privilege of not having any idea how the sound.  In my opinion, that’s a state of being worth holding on to (meaning you can post clips of the real Coldplay in the comments, but I won’t be clicking on them).

In the meantime, here’s one of the bands that I learned is not Coldplay: